Like this:

Women and girls alike have been conditioned to envy female celebrities. We have been conditioned to want to look like them, dress like them, have people lust over us as people lust over them. In the 1996 every woman wanted “Rachel’s hair”, in 1983 they wanted to dress like Madonna, in 1990 it was the thinness of Kate Moss, in 200- something it was hair like Giselle and probably still is, at some point it was lips and breasts like Scarlett Johanssen, and it’s always in to want to look like Angelina Jolie – just ask Megan Fox.

Men have been conditioned to view these women as sex symbols. FMH and Maxium strip them down and display all the goods, sure, there is airbrushing but no man thinks about that when he’s, hhhmmm, “blowing his nose” – no. Rather, I think the question is “why doesn’t my wife look like that, or my girlfriend, or I wonder if I could get her”.

Sex symbols have been around since at least Helen of Troy – hell, she’s still a sex symbol and we’ve never even seen her.

I am a married woman now. The skin is no longer as supple as that of a 2o year old. The breasts aren’t as high as a 16 year old or as firm as a 22 year old. The lines on the face started forming somewhere around 28.

Men couldn’t wait for the olsen twins to reach 18. Women, grown women had to hear men lusting for these 18 year olds. Playboy rarely places a woman over 23 as a centerfold – unless it is a celebrity they have been trying to get pose for like 15 years and then they take them when they are almost 40 – airburshed of course, like all the Playboy models.

What is a REAL woman anymore?

She spends an undisclosed sum on clothing, highlights or all over color depending on shade, she gets Botox and collegen, microdermbrasion and chemical peels, she has an eyebrow lift at 35, gets seaweed wraps to fight cellulite, goes to the gym for two hours everyday and does yoga 4 times a week. She watched what she eats, never gets whole milk at Starbucks unless her friends or around, this way she can say “I just have a fast metabolism” but she would never dream of eating ice cream in front of the boyfriend or husband for fear that he might think she has no self control – so when she complains “I am so FAT” instead of saying “Honey, you are the best looking woman in the entire gym – let’s get pizza tonight” he will say “Honey, if you’d lay off the treats, you’d look and feel better” or “Honey, if you’d run everyday after work like you say you want to, then you’d not be getting that little muffin top”.

We work our asses off and it is only understood that men will size up every other woman out there. That they will fantasize Megan Fox is folding the laundry instead of the wife. They will fantasize about Angelina Jolie and yet, their wife won’t have the same glow when she’s only dragging their 3 kids to the Target.

We will be the body that carries their children but they will still remember the stripper that gave them such a great lapdance that they creamed their jeans when they were 21. Or the random one night hook up that got them off in the front seat of the car. Or the breasts of that 18 year old they were lucky enough to bed when they were 30. When our bodies age and our breasts start to soften and drop – they will look at Cindy Crawford who is now 40 and wonder why at 35 their wife can’t look that good – dang that Randy Gerber sure has it good. And when Cindy Crawford is too old it will be someone else.

We lust over these images of celebrities without their permission. Some approve of course – Sierna Miller certainly knows when her breasts are on display out the hotel window.

As a woman – I am not jealous because I want to be them. I am not jealous because I want to look like them or lead a life like them. I am jealous because we don’t have real women standing up and saying, “I am a mom, I am sexy and my husband is faithful to me – through pregnancy and through aging, he doesn’t lust over other women, he has always praised me for being me.” I don’t need to look like any other woman, but I do have a need to feel sexy and desireable.

I am married. I don’t need to go to a club and have some man flirt with me. Youth gave me cofidence. Running was giving me confidence for a while. But now things are changing. I am married and moving on to the next stages of married life and I feel unattractive and old. I see the photos of Megan Fox and I miss my youth. I miss the luster my hair used to carry and the dewiness of my youthful skin. I am tired all the time. My husband works 10,000 miles from you. I don’t feel lustful eyes on my naked body when I am drying off in the shower. I don’t feel them or the touch of a warm hand on my belly when I am chopping vegetables for dinner. I don’t get a random spanking while pulling vegetables from the garden. I don’t get a morning kiss or to see that twinkle in his eyes that let me know he is only thinking about me.

Rather I am left to think about all the celebrity skin or real woman skin he sees in a day while mine ages months at a time until the next time we shall meet.

How does a real woman capture and hold her husband’s eye? Can men be tamed? Do you look at other women in ways you should be looking at your wife? Do you wonder how she might look at other men?